Monday, March 12, 2007

The Boo Police

Have we turned into a nation of sissies, folks? I just finished watching the evening broadcast of Fox News, and I have a sad story to report: competition is now politically incorrect. No, you didn't read that incorrectly. There is a particular school in my neck of the woods that will punish students for "booing" their rival. That's right, rally hats and chatter are outlawed now, because, after all, we wouldn't want to hurt some poor child's feelings, would we? Give me a break! I was going to write about the Vice-President and how I agree that timetables are simply an alarm clock for the insurgency, but this is just too mind-blowing.
Remember this? "We want a hitter, not a baby-sitter!" Or, this? "We want a pitcher, not a belly-itcher!" I do. I remember full and well when my baseball coach, Don Montgomery, told us to "psyche out the other team with a little chatter." Well, now that we're doing away with that, i guess we can do away with cheerleaders, too, right? I mean, we wouldn't want the other team to feel bad because not everyone is cheering them on. And I guess we can forget about moms and dads offering encouragement from the sidelines, because, after all, some other mom or dad out there might be offended that you are cheering your boy on and not his, huh?
SPECIAL BULLETIN! NOT EVERYONE IS GREAT AT EVERYTHING!
Sometimes you win, folks, sometimes you lose. I guess if not everyone wins, than everyone loses, at least, in this day and age. Look, I'm a parent, so I know how hard it is to tell your little eight-year old boy that he's no Hank Aaron, but i also live in the real world, and I'm telling you that if all we offer our kids is empty praise, tell them that as long as they beleive they can be, et cetera, et cetera, than we are raising a bunch of narcissists who are going to go through serious bouts of depression and alcoholism when they fail. And to those of you, who were so sure of your abilities, says, "if only Daddy had supported me," just remember this; maybe he was just trying to save you from your own mediocrity. Dreams are great, but despite what Walt Disney tells you, you also have to be talented, dedicated, and willing to make the proper sacrifices.
You have to wake up to this, folks, because if you don't, you're going to find yourselves surrounded by a bunch of bored, unstimulated kids asking you what to do because the game of Tag has been outlawed. After all, someone else might be faster, or smarter, or just plain lucky, and that wouldn't be "fair," now , would it? But, never mind, just give them a "C," tell them that their fairy godmother is waiting, and watch as the most apathetic generation is born.
Go to http://www.fox14tv.com/links.html for the news in my region.

2 comments:

Andrew Langer said...

AC -

Excellent post. I experienced this firsthand - or should I say, the baseball team at my high school experienced this first hand.

They were invited to play in a tournement at Yankee Stadium (yes, I went to HS in the Bronx). But the principal, a grade-a PC shocktrooper, declined their invitation on the grounds that the school didn't believe in competition.

Let me tell you, it was quite a lesosn they learned: essentially, you have to squash your personal dreams if they make you run the risk of being disappointed in competition.

For a school that prided itself on lifting up people whose potential dream realizations were at a distinct disadvantage, this decision was nothing short of paternalistic elitism.

I expect there are still people bitter about not getting their chance to swing a bat in the House that Ruth Built.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your thoughts, sir, it's always good to hear from a Yankees fan. Personally, I always felt the Bronx Bombers got gyped on the 2001 series...c'mon, the Diamondbacks? You've gotta be kidding me.