What Happened To Dad?

Why is Dad such an idiot?  I don't mean my dad, or even your dad.  I'm talking about T.V. Dad.  Why aren't there any good dads on  television?  It's Sunday night, and many of you will sit down with your families and watch the Fox Trio, The Simpsons, American Dad, and Family Guy.  What do all three of those T.V. shows have in common?  The father figure is an absolute doofus and the butt of half of the jokes.  Homer is a drunk, slobbering boob, Stan is a conservative stereotype screw-up, and Peter is mentally retarded.  At the end of most episodes, they try to soften it up with a "gee-whiz, Dad's a dummy, but he loves his family" sort of thing that's supposed to teach us all lessons of some kind, but what we really take away from it is that the dad should be institutionalized and the mom should get a  medal  for putting up with him and the smart-alec kids.  Is this really a mirror of the modern family, or is Dad getting shafted?  Sure, we all probably remember something from childhood where our dads embarrassed us, and now that we're older, some of us are embarrassing our own children now, but when I think about my  dad, I just wish I could be half  the man he is.  Some of you weren't so lucky.  For some of you, your dad was a drunk slob, or an idiot, or he cheated on your mom right in front of you.  You have an opportunity and a responsibility to be better than that.  Fortunately, there is no precise definition for what a dad is.  Unfortunately, it's going to be an uphill battle, because not only are you under assault as a dad, but as a man in general.  How many times have you seen a commercial for a hamburger joint that showed the stupid bachelor who can't even fry an egg, or watched a beer commercial that showed the fool who bought a six pack instead of the much needed toilette paper?  I mean, if I see one more sitcom or commercial where the man, like a toddler, cries, "but honey, the game's on" while the all-knowing always-right wife or girlfriend stands in front of the T.V. badgering him about some stupid chore, I will destroy my television.  Leave the freaking guy alone already, will you?  Where is the dad that helps mom with the dishes after dinner?  Where is the dad that taught junior how to ride a bike, or throw a ball?  Where is that person that taught you how to be a responsible, honest, independent adult? Okay- so your dad drinks a beer in front of the T.V. after work.  He goes bowling on Wednesday with his friends.  He has a hotrod in the garage he likes to work on every Saturday, and he doesn't like chick flicks.  He'd rather go fishing than shopping for drapes.  So what?  Thirty years ago, we called that hard working guy with hobbies "Dad."  Now we call him "Homer."